Saturday, February 27, 2010

Saturday Morning Reflection #26

Good Morning Everyone....

Will it ever quit snowing? I am soooo ready for some Spring/Summer. I seem to be spending more time looking at fishing trips on the internet. I just wanna go, catch something (fish) kill it, and cook it. Also, for those of you that laughed because I clarified what I wanted to catch...stop knew exactly what I meant.

I finally got to start training on the new system at work. The concept is fantastic, and although it has been installed at several other locations there seems to be numerous "glitches." I still can hear the "Amway" song echoing thru my head. Guess we will have to wait and see.

It is quiet this morning, except for Miss Josie...running thru the house. She is a bundle of energy and I wish she could be taught to do something useful.

Lastly, before I move on...Congrats to the person that finished RT. God Bless you and I hope for only good news in your future. you go...
Two elderly women were out driving in a large car - both could barely see over the dashboard. As they were cruising along, they came to an intersection. The stoplight was red, but they just went on through. The woman in the passenger seat thought to herself "I must be losing it. I could have sworn we just went through a red light."

After a few more minutes, they came to another intersection and the light was red again. Again, they went right through. The woman in the passenger seat was almost sure that the light had been red but was really concerned that she was losing it. She was getting nervous.

At the next intersection, sure enough, the light was red and they went on through. So, she turned to the other woman and said, "Mildred, did you know that we just ran through three red lights in a row? You could have killed us both!" Mildred turned to her and said, "Oh my! Am I driving?"

Well, until the next time...Please remember that I have to pay the bills.

Saturday, February 20, 2010

Saturday Morning Reflection #25

Good Morning Everyone,

Can you believe how hard it is snowing and how awful it is outside?.....Hey...Wait a minute...Do I see some sunshine? My fishing poles are calling.

The Amway...I people have been doing training at work on the new system. I haven't been involved yet, but most of the staff are impressed with the new system. Maybe the Govt has done something right.

This morning the house is filled with the sound of sleeping kids. Miss Josie Cat did her best to wake us this morning by knocking the tv remote off of the nightstand. This normally happens at 0430. Seems she has developed a habit. Perhaps I will need to send her to rehab...or maybe just a good old fashioned kitty spanking. Oh stop it and quit looking so appalled...I do believe in corporal punishment (and pleasure). Enough of that...

It is rapidly moving towards spring, and we all know what happens in spring. A young mans thoughts turn towards thoughts of....Spring Walleye fishing. I might just try and make that trip this year. Any of you guys interested just let me know. I might also make a quick run up for a weekend....haven't decided yet. I do believe I will have dinner at The Garden though.

I guess I am gonna have to tell you about the most interesting thing from last night...There I was in Kroger's...minding my own business...and what to my wandering eyes did I see? A man down on one knee, proposing to a woman. She said yes. They hugged and kissed. Pictures were taken. Then we all went to dinner. lets hear the rest of the story(yes, I plagarized that). My friend Travis was introduced to his girlfriend on 021909. They fell deeply in love and have been co-habitating for some time now. Travis had wanted to propose to her in the place where she was when he first spoke with her. Aisle 12 at the Krogers in Proctorville, OH. I assisted him with this plan by...getting permission to take pictures, inviting them to dinner at my house (I had no intention of cooking), and calling to get them to stop at Krogers and pick something up for me. I called her cell phone when she was in the correct place and turned her around so that Travis could get down on his old, arthritic, debilitated knee and present her with the ring and the question. Karen's daughter was in on the surprise also. My daughter, her friend, and my girlfriend Jackie were also there. Many pictures were taken.

Travis...after the many trials and tribulations that you have been thru, you deserve this. The chance for love and happiness is within your grasp. I truly believe that the two of you are just meant to be and I wish you nothing but peace and happiness throughout the rest of your lives.

A word of advice from the old man...One must experience both ends of the spectrum in order to truly enjoy the peace in the middle.

Ginger...I didn't forget about you...

A certain little girl, when asked her name, would reply, "I'm Mr. Sugarbrown's daughter."

Her mother told her this was wrong, she must say, "I'm Jane Sugarbrown."

The Vicar spoke to her in Sunday School and said, "Aren't you Mr. Sugarbrown's daughter?"

She replied, "I thought I was, but mother says I'm not."

Well, until the next time...Please remember that I have to pay the bills.

Saturday, February 13, 2010

Saturday Morning Reflection #24

Good morning everyone,

Lets start today off by giving thanks for the positive influences in our lives. Perhaps, we should also spend some time praying for those around us that have negative items in their lives. I am sure that we will ALL be remembered in someone's prayers.

The work week was rather busy. My regular job (as many of you know) is very hectic. I love that it is not the type of work that goes home with you. I also like the pace of the work. Next week the Amway...I mean trainers for the new system will be there. I am not looking forward to listening to the new people spew forth a canned rhetoric about how "good" their particular brand of Amway, I mean software, is.

Lets reflect on the past week. Damn, how things can change so quickly. Since this is directed at those of you "in the know" then you already know. Sorry to those that don't, but you should keep in closer contact. Guess everyone will just have to wait and see.

Bill..How about this wednesday or next? I bet you can make it out and the wine stock at Frankie D's needs to be drank down a little. Expensuve but well worth it. Just give me a yell.

Adam and Stephanie...we gotta get together and do some Sangria while we still have a DD...

Travis...dude lets kill something and grill it...Maybe on the 19th. That is the only mention of that I am going to make....everybody....please stayed tuned for a HUGE update.
I am so ready for some warm weather. I think I am going to sneak off to NC when the tuna run. Anybody else interested in trying to catch one of those 600lbs MONSTERS? And yes, I am still tallking about fish. Let me know and we will try to charter a boat.

Ginger...this one is for you...

Theory of M&M Evolution

Whenever I get a package of plain M&Ms, I make it my duty to continue the strength and robustness of the candy as a species.

To this end, I hold M&M duels.

Taking two candies between my thumb and forefinger,I apply pressure, squeezing them together until one of them cracks and splinters. That is the "loser," and I eat the inferior one immediately. The winner gets to go another round.

I have found that, in general, the brown and red M&Ms are tougher, and the newer blue ones are genetically inferior. I have hypothesized that the blue M&Ms as a race cannot survive long in the intense theatre of competition that is the modern candy and snack-food world.

Occasionally I will get a mutation, a candy that is misshapen, or pointier, or flatter than the rest. Almost invariably this proves to be a weakness, but on very rare occasions it gives the candy extra strength. In this way, the species continues to adapt to its environment.

When I reach the end of the pack, I am left with one M&M, the strongest of the herd. Since it would make no sense to eat this one as well, I pack it neatly in an envelope and send it to: M&M Mars, A Division of Mars, Inc. Hackettstown, NJ 17840-1503 U.S.A., along with a 3x5 card reading, "Please use this M&M for breeding purposes."

Wel...until the next time...please remember that I have to pay the bills.

Saturday, February 6, 2010

Saturday Morning Reflection #23

Good morning everyone....Seems as if today will be filled with wet snow. I hope everyone is safe,warm, and dry.

The past few weeks, work has been filled Not very much to be said about that. The bills just keep coming and we just keep trying to push them out the door. The boss tells us that a new system is being implemented. It is so easy to use that we basically are shutting down for two weeks and going to training to learn to use it. Every morning during our meeting we discuss the new system. I think next week we get to sing the Amway ....I system song. They have spent more time trying to convince us the new system is great than a Kirby sweeper salesman spends selling his sweeper. Since the implementation of the last new system we still haven't stopped working overtime. Wonder how far this one will spread out the OT?

Lets talk Superbowl. Two really good teams. Two great quarterbacks. Only one gets to win. I would so much like to see a Saints victory, but my senses tell me....

Colts 28 and the Saints 17 This one will be a yawner, unless Manning takes a BIG HIT AND goes down AND is not 100% when he goes back to the huddle. Should that happen watch the Saints defense gain some confidence and create some turnovers.

Is it time to go fishing yet?

Ginger...I didn't forget you...

Tired of having to balance his wife Cindy's checkbook, Mike made a deal with her; he would look at it, but only after she had spent a few hours trying to wrestle it into shape.

The following night, after spending hours poring over stubs and figures, Cindy said proudly, "I've done it! I made it balance!"

Impressed, Mike came over to take a look. "Let's see... mortgage 550.00, electricity 70.50, phone 35.00." His brow wrinkled as he read the last entry. "It says here ESP, $615. What the heck is that?"

"Oh," she said, "That means, Error Some Place!"

Well, until the next time...please remember that I have to pay the bills.